Walking the Tight Rope…

….that is my every day present.

We all have choices and that goes for attitude towards life/self as well. I am the first to admit that I am stubborn.  I don’t give up easily AND, at the same time,  I am my own worst enemy…which is a combination that keeps me on a tightrope, working a balancing act every single day…image on left depicting so clearly how I feel…making it ever so easy to lean to the right, or to the left…the left  being the pit of self doubt and fear, which just ensures I will stay “stuck “, the right being that where I grab onto all the opportunities that come my way…by way of connecting deeper with the beautiful Souls that I’m privileged to either meet in person or online by way of social media….and where I find the Best way to Let my Light Shine.

This blog I guess you could say is a foray towards the latter.

I’ve dabbled in blogging for the past 7 years, and am not quite understanding fully….ok, I do have an inkling, …as to why I have chosen to NOT consistently communicate with my world by way of this blog, as it gives me so much pleasure to do so. Remember…”own worst enemy”….cause I kind of like to write/connect by way of the written word. So, just duh Ruth for holding back. So, here I go….

No matter how much I have blogged/not blogged throughout the year, I have indeed started each New Year with a blog capsulizing the year prior and putting out, in one form or another, what I look to focus on for the following year.It’s  been like a rite of passage for the new calendar year…which I’m tackling at a record “late date” for 2017, it coming to the end of Feb already. Actually depends which calendar you are using as reference. IE for Thai New Year, which is mid April, I would be considered to be quite early for this 🙂

If I were to be totally frank with you…and why not/what have I got to lose, I think the reason I’ve been shying away from fulfilling this annual ritual for 2017 is that I’ve been feeling that I’ve been sorely failing in the department of moving that needle forward as I have put out there each and every year all these cool things that I really DO want to do/be and just feel that I could STILL make each of those intentions a priority AGAIN this year, and it just wasn’t’ making me feel good about where I am. IE why put out to the world that which you are sure to fail at….again?

So, although I  still feel that I haven’t fulfilled all those promises to myself…those most honorable resolves, intentions, mantras, whatever you want to call it that I put out at the beginning of the calendar year…I have nonetheless  decided to cut myself some slack. Yes, leaning to the positive right on the tight rope. I have decided to recognize the fact that even though I may not be where I want to be in Life, that I am indeed moving that needle forward. I’ve decided to embrace the fact that I apparently still have lessons to learn. I’ve decided to appreciate that  although each step may be tiny that at least it is a step forward, that I have moved from going one step ahead two back…been there/that sucks!…to making tiny steps forward…in that each landing is not as low as the one previously…so, yes, I am acknowledging  progress. Whoo hoo!

To that end I did take a few moments at the end of 2016 to list what I saw as my “accomplishments”, unique to 2016. Some are related to my work life, and some to my personal life. They are ALL relevant in my books. Good to share a handful here/keep as succinct as possible, as I don’t want to lose you/assuming you are still with me….

On the business side of things…
ZAAR Design center, I have always coined as my  “evolving entity”…that which I initiated in 2010.   Antiques by Zaar, my 16 year old biz,  continues to serve as the anchor for said entity but having a website to represent this shift was a long time coming.  Fall 2016 I launched my spanky new site for ZAAR Design Center and as such I can finally stop saying, when I give people my cards “don’t judge me by my website.” Thank you Meridith Kovach for your invaluable help in creating this store front for me. I’m thrilled.

In the interest of having a wider reach, beyond the traffic coming to my website, I have broadened my base and have enjoyed sales coming in from Houzz, Etsy, Chairish, Pinterest, and Design Life Network. AND, I’ve JUST been invited to sell on Wayfair, which I think is pretty cool.
I have heard many times that you can’t expect to grow your business on your own. And that it isn’t a sin that you can’t do it alone. Really?  Yes, we can still be “superwomen” even if we have help to achieve our goals. In fact THAT is what makes us “superwomen”….realizing that it does take a village.  I have come to embrace this and am grateful for the team I have behind me….those helping me with the work, those who support me by way of mentorship and the cheerleaders I am blessed to have in my corner, by way of friends and family members.

So, I feel my business is  more “anchored” than it has for awhile.

I continue to enjoy selling the Chinese Antiques which brought me into the home furnishings realm 16 years ago. I also LOVE working with other companies/representing them and bringing their product to the market…most significantly representing, for what is my 5th year now, the British Company Distinctive Chesterfields...relationship which really helped  set the path for ZAAR.

On the personal side I can feel good about having my name put forward by my dear friend Betty Lynn Eller, to be part of an article in Good Housekeeping, highlighting “50 Women over 50”…women who were embracing this time of their lives..which I do. What a great experience to have been included in this…yup, a little ‘celebrity’ moment.

NOTE: If you care to read in more detail how I see myself as a “Purveyor”, you can do so on the About US/Meet Ruth section of my website.

I enjoy singing in my church choir at the Kent Island United Methodist Church/happy for this venue to keep the vocal chords/sight reading skills sharp….and what a great and welcoming community of singers.

For the first time since college days, where I HAD to, when I was a music major for one brief year, I sang a solo for the Easter Cantata. It was small BUT it was nonetheless a solo AND I didn’t mess it up. Yup, worked through that fear thing.

I did what I never thought I’d do, after not even caring to do it for the first time 4 years ago, and that was to run my 2nd half marathon at at Virginia Beach, Labor Day weekend.  I’ve been casually running for what seems like forever, and not being an athlete, it sort of became my “thing” I guess.  Feeling I was in worst shape then I was four years prior, I was simply hoping to finish. However, I was to be surprised by the fact that I actually beat my previous time by almost 20 minutes, completing in 2 hours/40 minutes! Another whoo hoo! and yes, up for another. In fact it is officially booked. Tinkerbell challenge at Disney in CA….mothers day weekend…10k on Sat and 1/2 marathon on Sunday. Thank you Avery for inciting this for your mama who although runs regularly, still doesn’t see herself as a runner.

And although not necessarily an accomplishment,it was a big deal for me, in that, after a 20 year hiatus, I revisited Haiti , where I lived for 5 years back in the mid ’80’s...but had been first introduced to when I was 12 years old.  I was inspired to write about it and in fact did two, yes lengthy, blogs about such back in Dec., shortly after my return.  First missive, My Haiti Story, and 2nd  Hike for Haiti: A Traveller’s Journal.  Part of the trip included a 26 mile hike across the mountains of Haiti and the fact that I did so without feeling like I was going to die, was a pretty big deal to me….to the point where the avid hikers that I was with, honored me by inducting me as a “hiker” going forward. But more relevant is that it was truly wonderful way for me  to again, experience, this beautiful country and it’s people…and if interested in doing so, reach out to me.. the 2nd annual hike, organized through FIDA, is slated for December 2017.  You can count on it being a life changing experience.

So, when I look back, 2016 was pretty ok….giving me a good starting point for 2017. Only 2 months in, and I am still walking that tight rope BUT I’m leaning a little more to the right than the left these days, and when I do it feels pretty darn good.

So, to end this missive I am going to keep it real short and to the point about what I have set as “intentions” for 2017.

These words will ring in my ear as I move forward….PIVOT, ALIGN and THRIVE/PROSPER.  Yes, I can and will do this!  I will get out of my way. I will work through the Fear and Appreciate the Steps.  You will know, as I will continue to connect by way of facebook and instagram posts, and here, on my blog…and yes, I will keep it real/as I don’t know any other way.

For now, I thank for you for taking  this time to get this little window on my world. My wish for YOU is that 2017 is all that you intend it to be….and more ! We have 10 months to make that magic happen.  Let me know about YOUR magic.   Ruth